Yes, absolutely beautiful
Thank you for happening.
I know at this time of year, so many people start cursing the fact that the past year existed.… but I’m not going to do that to you. I could easily hate you and place blame on you for holding bad memories, horrible moments, things I would like to forget, but if I’m being honest with myself, I wouldn’t change a single thing.
At this time of year, people look back at so many “bad” occurrences and promise themselves that they will be better so as to minimize the “bad” moments in the future. But I want to tell you, dear 2012, that you have taught me to embrace those unfortunate moments. It is within moments like getting the worst grades of your college career that you find the determination to finally get your best. It is at the darkest moment of feeling loneliness’ deepest, most threatening clutch that you find the strength to find focus in the people who bring happiness and light back to your life. Amidst the maze of not knowing who you are, you are able to abandon yourself before God and realize that it is only He who knows the path you should be on and where you are going. During a time when you begin to despair and question whether or not you are searching in the right places for the person you think you need in your life, you are finally able to realize that it is through focusing on yourself that you build a place for the person you are meant to have to finally step in. It is by reaching a point of desperation that you finally begin the necessary descent into ultimately letting go of the reigns to your life and begin to trust that wherever the road goes, you will be taken care of.
When I began 2012, I never had any idea that the year could actually change me. I vowed to do so many superficial things… run more, study more, do better, be better… but at the end of you, dearest 2012, I realize that I was never completely in control. I tried to control you, own you, tell you what I needed, demand for you to bring me who I needed and where I needed to be. I never asked you to change me, rather I demanded for you to allow me to shape myself in the ways I thought I needed to be shaped.
And then I let go.
I let myself go to you and all the twisting ways you decided to change me. I let you show me that you will bring me exactly what I need, if only I am willing to listen and pay attention to your cues. I let you show me that when you bring me challenges, I should pay attention and realize that you are trying to make me better. I let you show me that when I stop trying to figure out who I want in my life, you bring me exactly who I have needed in my life. I let you show me that when I stop trying to be the best at something that is not me, you bring me success in what I have now learned is exactly me. 2012, you showed me that I am best when I am listening to the small intuitions which naturally occur within me every second of every day.
So dear 2012, while I could curse you and hate you for not giving me success in the resolution which I made at the beginning of you, I want to thank you in the deepest way for giving me the growth which I have now realized I so desperately needed. You hurt me and tossed me around only in the hopes of making me appreciate the goodness and strength within me. I hope you know, 2012, that I will enter 2013 open to all of the experiences which the next 365 days bring me. I understand now that heartache is a part of the game. I will fail, I will succeed. I will be cursed, I will be blessed. I will be loved, I will be lost. I will stay, I will grow. But beyond all of this, I will inch 365 steps closer to the person you have pushed me closer to becoming.
Thank you 2012, and welcome lovely 2013.
All my love,
very, very true…
this is too beautiful…
the perfect couple
mine. please don’t change the source if it gets notes :)
lovely coral colour <3